Genre:
Adult Historical Thriller
Word Count: 65,000
Pitch: 1920's New York City, a desperate female
magician with nothing to lose and everything to gain, a path of murdered
magicians, one hot Italian boxer, another mad magician, all creating A BEAUTIFUL
MADNESS.
Excerpt:
I've become an animal. I
know I'm above this, but if there is one thing I've learned it's this: an empty
stomach will drive even the most dignified person to rummage through a trash
can. I brush a fly from the hard chunk of bread before stuffing it into my
mouth.
And hate myself for it.
I hunch over the food as
I inhale it, glancing over my shoulder, making sure no one sees me. Just
because I'm an animal doesn't mean the world needs to know. I straighten up,
square my shoulders, wipe my mouth and slip out of the alleyway into the throng
of bodies too busy getting where they're going to worry about me.
I leave the disgrace
behind, promising I'll never degrade myself again by digging through
garbage, but I'm a liar. It's a promise I've been breaking for over a year now.
The smell of roasted peanuts
hits me as I walk into the theater and it makes my mouth water. I gather
my cleaning supplies and attempt to focus on cleaning to get my mind off
the hollow of my belly. Distraction is a hungry person's best friend and lucky
for me, the theater is full of distractions.
I eye the pile of crushed
peanut shells I've swept and with once quick glance around, stuff a handful of
them into my pocket for later, hoping there are more than just shells in there.
As I throw the rest away, my mouth salivates at the thought of the salty shells
on my tongue.
$100 bill on this.
ReplyDeleteThis looks like just the place to build a nice hotel - excellent view.
ReplyDeleteThis looks like just the place to build a nice hotel - excellent view.
ReplyDeleteAdvance to full Request (trumps partial) card.
ReplyDeleteI'm quite smitten and will spend $20 for the query and first 20 pages.
ReplyDeleteThanks,
Terrie Wolf, AKA
Oh. My. Goodness. This scene. This opening scene. SO vivid! It's rare for me that a first page can rouse the instant movie-in-my-mind feeling, but you nailed it. Too awesome!
ReplyDeleteI knew the moment I read this that I wanted it and I was going to have to fight for it. I used strategy to get it and still had to battle for it as this was one of the tie-breaker matches in the draft. My wish list before the slush read was for a story featuring a magician (not a wizard, but a magician). It's kinda like The Prestige - a historical magician story, but with a female lead...did I mention I'm a HUGE historical fan. The strong female lead in a time when women's rights were still being fought over also ticked a big box for me.
ReplyDeleteThen the writing! Killer opening line - so hard to do. The MC voice, the descriptions are all perfect.
Even though this got 5 bids, I actually did think it would have more. I'm sure someone will snap this up and then you have to put me in the acknowledgements!
Oh believe me, Sharon, if this gets picked up you will most definitely be in the acknowledgements! I can't thank you enough. And that goes for all the slush readers that kept putting it through to the next round. I'm still a little shocked. Thanks to the agents as well! I look forward to getting this MS in your hands! :)
ReplyDeleteWoW, so powerful. No wonder you got a request for a full. Wonderful!
ReplyDeleteWonderful concept. Very nicely done!
ReplyDelete